Friday, January 22, 2010
Day 19 - Furnaces, Bridges and Haircuts - Oh My!
Here we are on Day 19! So far, this week has been a good mix of a couple great practices (meaning I felt super anxious and welcomed it) and lots of stress management over buying a new furnace - ouch! Over the weekend, I got a chance to drive over the Enon bridge. Even on the way there, I said once or twice, "You know, I might choose to just be a passenger. OK? It's alright if I choose that." And then, as we approached it I thought, "OK, I can do this. I want this," and it wasn't so bad. Such was the case with other practices, like getting my hair cut and highlighted. Even as I moved forward, ready to show up, I had worries about getting panicky and feeling embarrassed. I'm really working on dropping the critics voice that says I should be ashamed of having anxiety in everyday situations. I've been fighting that internal battle for too long and getting nowhere. It turned out that I handled the few big waves of adrenaline, accepted that my face was red and thoroughly enjoyed the pampering afternoon!
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
7 comments:
That is wonderful that you had such success! It is funny that you mention the haircut/highlight thing because since my anxiety has come back that is one of my fears. I think it it the fear of having a panic attack and being "trapped" or embarrased. I had been doing well lately and then yesterday had a "setback". I was supposed to meet a friend at the bookstore with our kids and she called to say she would be an hour late after we already got there. I could feel the panic coming on and tried to just go with it, but I ended up calling her and saying we would just reschedule because I had to pick my daughter up at school shortly anyway. I feel terrible now that I left the situation because I never do that. I keep telling myself that setbacks happen and that I will go back and do it again and work through it. I think my challenges should be putting myself in situations where I can't leave whenever I want and just experience the feelings that brings! Thanks for your blog. It helps me so much to read your posts!
Oh, and I looked at the picture of that bridge, and I think that would make someone without anxiety nervous!!!! Great job! : )
Hi Meredith,
I agree - any of that social piece is both feeling trapped & embarrassed for me, too. I think feeling socially anxious can be harder to tackle for those reasons.
I think it's great that you were able to sit with your feelings of rising panic, even if you had to leave. As much as you can, give yourself credit for showing up and being willing to meet her in the first place. That takes courage! Can you schedule to meet her again and see how it goes? For me, the sooner I approach the feared situation again, the easier it is. And, I think it's ok to leave yourself an out if it feels safer -no need to not be able to leave. Take care! :)
Thanks so much! I will definitely go back. The hard part is that I haven't had issues with these things for years and since anxiety has crept back in so have my old social fears. I have been making myself do everything and just floating with the anxiety, so when I left the situation I felt like such a failure! I had a positive "challenge" this weekend... went to a high school reunion lunch with some girls I graduated with and hadn't seen in years. I was very nervous beforehand but I went and I ended up being fine! Thanks so much for your encouragement. It means so much! Hope your having some good luck this week too! : )
Sounds like an exciting time for you and yours- update us on the haircut results! It seems to be a winter timing thing- I'm daydreaming about a new look (maybe brunette?) myself:)
Hi Meredith -- the girls lunch sounds wonderful! Way to go! I do the same thing - worry like crazy anticipating & then it ends up being fine or even fun! I think the big thing is to keep putting ourselves out there, living a rich life -- my friend Michael runs an anxiety clinic and he calls it living an "exposure lifestyle" - I love it!
Hey Maggie! I went to see Teresa & she made me a little more blonde for the winter. Something about sitting in that chair for a while gets me nervous, but she's SO lovely. By the time I left, I felt so calm from just being around her.
I'd love to see your brunette when you get it done! I also have a great book to recommend about librarians as superheroes!
Post a Comment